He squirmed like day being smothered by night. The sound slipped out again. He fidgeted. It doubled its volume. He coughed. His sphincter coughed back. It was a battle lost.
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He squirmed like day being smothered by night. The sound slipped out again. He fidgeted. It doubled its volume. He coughed. His sphincter coughed back. It was a battle lost.
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I was cutting classes in a noble sort of way, as a kind of scholar-in-residence who was pursuing an independent line of study.
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As the news of this meeting of the two great undead authors spread, a crowd of thousands amassed on the vast green plain around them. The summer sun was scorching, and before long not a few of the onlookers had to be treated for heat stroke while enterprising merchants seized the opportunity to charge...
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Again came the unearthly shrieking, sounding like nothing I’d ever heard before. I bounded out of bed and ran to the open window, shivering as I peered into the darkness.
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"Just making small talk, Dave. I was thinking the other day that the afterlife must be a lot like Facebook. Everybody floating around in space vying for divine attention. I mean, heaven must be the greatest status of all. Am I right?"
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He hung up and tried to text her, but his fingers trembled. Instead of writing, “Please come back,” he wrote, “Peace some lack.” Good enough, he thought, and hit send.
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Beth and Liza found themselves the interim co-directors of both the rink’s Skate With Us program and the Sherman Figure Skating Club’s upcoming performance of “Cinderella on Ice.” It was as if Khrushchev and Kennedy had been required to share the job of secretary general of the United Nations. Or to run a restaurant...
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“No bread and butter,” his father said with vinegar on his tongue and that was the end of that.
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“OK, Beyoncé, why don’t you introduce me to the rest of your brothers and sisters.”
Emboldened, the girl moved forward slightly and pointed at each child in turn.
“That’s Dappy, he’s the oldest, Jagger, Britney, Elvis, Bono, Amy, Norton is the one with the frilly pink shirt, that’s KD in the boiler suit, Freddie, Ringo...
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